Think Huge by Mark Arnold

Wii Are Family: An Unexpected Gift Of Time

A colleague of mine got a pleasant surprise recently. She and her husband bought their six-year-old son a Nintendo Wii video game for Christmas and she relayed the following story to me.

“I was not excited about this purchase. Even though it was my idea to research the Wii, I got cold feet thinking about the cost. It was a pretty big investment for us when we factored in other presents we had already purchased. My husband was sold early on, and he eventually talked me into it, against what I thought was my better judgment. I’ve never been so happy to admit I was wrong. Something that I perceived as a waste of time and money has actually become more than a Christmas gift for the whole family. It has become a gift of time.

I have never been a fan of video games. Even when I was a kid, I wasn’t very good at them. So the first time my son asked me to “bowl” with him, I was not excited. But, it was important to him, so I decided to grin and bear it. What I was reminded of during that 30-minute play date was something all parents need to be reminded of once in a while – time is the best, most lasting gift we will ever give our children.

Kids have an amazing way of not caring how well we do something, as long as we’re doing it with them. I’m admittedly better at video games than I used to be, but not as good as my six-year-old. He beat me at bowling many times that first day (and many times since then), but neither one of us cared. We’re both winners, because we found a new way to maximize our quality time together. And, I have the best kind of proof that it meant as much to my son as it did to me.

After we finished playing video games that day, I went back to my computer to do some work, and he went to the kitchen table to color. What he produced was the drawing pictured here. It’s a picture of us playing the Wii together. He told me it was one of the best “dates” we’ve ever had.”

It doesn’t take a lot of money, a lot of skill or a lot of any size gifts to make kids happy. It just takes time. Find something simple your kids like to do and do it with them. It doesn’t matter what it is, as long as you’re doing it together.”

Think Huge!

Start New Year by Thinking Huge

Welcome to 2010!

 

As the New Year begins, there is no better time to Think Huge. We’re already several days into January and many of us are off and running. Activity and business, however, does not always mean success.

 

As we said in the book, Think Huge means, “Going many steps beyond where you are today and pushing past your comfort zone. In other words, not limiting yourself. We sometimes put an invisible ceiling on what we can accomplish in life. Thinking huge means removing those barriers and accomplishing our dreams and ambitions. Maybe you want to be the teacher of the year. Or the top salesperson. Or the CEO. Or a more involved parent. Or a more loving spouse. Or _______. You fill in the blank with what areas you want to think huge.”

 

You are probably thinking (or have already set) your goals for 2010. One way to set goals this year is to break them into the six Think Huge areas:

 

• Vision
• People
• Passion
• Time
• Perseverance
• Learning

 

Here are some questions to consider in each area and then examples you can use for your 2010 goals:

 

(1)    Vision

 

Do you have a vision statement for your life, department, organization, etc.? One goal might be to write your six word personal and/or professional vision statement.

 

(2)    People

 

Who do you want to be close to or get to know this year? For example, there may be a family member you want to reach out to, an old friend to reconnect with, or a child you want to hang out with more.

 

(3)    Passion

 

Is there a particular hobby or interest you want to develop more this year? Maybe this is the year you buy the Harley! One of my passions is to speaking so one of my 2010 passion goals is to do multiple Think Huge presentations (if you want to book me, click here—how’s that for a shameless self-plug!).

 

(4)    Time

 

How can you maximize your time in 2010? Maybe it’s to reduce the number of meetings you are in or to better streamline your meetings. Other time goal examples could include spending “x” number of hours a week for yourself, spending less hours at work, or improving a particular skill you have by practicing it more.

 

(5)    Perseverance

 

Is there some area of your life you are discouraged and want to quit? Don’t give up—persevere. Perseverance goal examples could be running a marathon or half marathon, finishing school, changing your job if you’re unhappy, improving your marriage, etc.

 

(6)    Learning

 

If you’re not learning, you’re not growing. What are you going to learn this year? Examples include taking a college class, reading one business book per month, attending a conference, etc.

 

 

You probably have multiple goals for 2010. Hopefully you have some in all six Think Huge areas. What Think Huge goals have you set for 2010? Please share yours in the comments section below.

 

Think Huge!

What To Do During "Dead" Week

Do you remember “dead” week in college? That’s the time between when classes end and finals begin. In theory, you’re supposed to spend that week studying (or cramming!) for your upcoming exams. Of course, it probably didn’t always work that way.

The week between Christmas and New Year’s has also become a “dead week” in some cases. Lots of businesses close or certainly work with a skeleton crew. Whether you are in the office or hanging with your family, here are some suggestions for how best to spend this week:

Home and Personal

(1)    Reconnect with your family

Odds are, work takes you away from family time throughout the year. That’s just the way work works (so to speak). Now is the perfect time to give back some of that missed time with your spouse, significant other and children. Play a game, go to the park, do something that doesn’t involve watching TV, etc.

(2)    Read a book

Too tired to read when you get home from work? If that’s the case, this is the perfect week to catch up on your reading. While I’m a big proponent of reading business books, this is also a good time to enjoy some pleasure reading as well. Read just for the fun of reading.

(3)    Get some extra sleep

Most days you are probably rushing to the office on less sleep than you need. If you can, take this “off” week to sleep late. That may be “pie in the sky” for most of us but do your best to play catch-up with your ZZs.

(4)    Express gratitude to your loved ones

Take a few minutes to give a heart-felt “thank you” to those closest to you. Maybe write them a note or card. Of course, telling them in your own words, face-to-face is also good. While we love those closest to us,  in the day to day rat race it’s important to slow down and tell your kids, your spouse, your family how much you love them. Yes, they probably know you love them. But tell them anyway.

Work

(1)    Reflect on 2009

Take some time this week to think. Many of us are task oriented and go from action item to action item. That’s good, but sometimes we need to pause and take stock of all that’s happened this past year. Slow down. Think. Reflect. What did you accomplish this year? What areas can you improve?

(2)    Prepare for 2010

January 4, 2010 (the first business day of the year) will be here before you know it. And you will need to have your track shoes ready that day. You know there will be a ton of e-mails and projects waiting for you. With that being the case, take an hour or two (or even more) during this slower paced week and make sure you have everything in order for 2010. What projects need highest priority? What is your top goal that absolutely, positively has to be accomplished in 2010?

(3)    Organize your office

Confession time: my office is an absolute mess. I let dust pile up and stacks accumulate. Why? Mostly because I just don’t take the time to organize my office. With fewer interruptions this week now could be the perfect time to devote a few hours to your office. Another plus: you don’t want to start the new year with old files. So be sure to clean out things you won’t need for next year.

(4)    Leave early or take a long lunch with a friend

If you can, try to take some time for people this week. Have a coffee date with a friend. If you can’t get out of the office then have an extended conversation with a co-worker. And don’t always talk about work—get to know them as a person.

What other ideas do you have for how to spend this “dead” week? Post a comment and suggestion and share your thoughts.

Think Huge!

Allow Time for the Unexpected

Note: This is an excerpt from the book Think Huge: Elevating Your Life and Your Business

Let’s be honest with each other: stuff happens. We get so busy with our jobs or daily tasks that we don’t leave enough time for people. We have to allow time for the unexpected.

I tend to struggle with this. I come to work with a “To Do” list that is 20 items deep. I immediately check my e-mails and voicemails, get entranced by the computer and start working on marking off those tasks. Then two hours later I look up and realize I haven’t even said “hello” to my employees! Ouch—what kind of leader is that?

Heaven forbid we’re in the middle of one of our all important tasks and one of our employees walks in and needs a few minutes of our time to talk. That’s hard. But it is reality.

In Massage Today, author Perry Isenberg noted, “You need to leave some time available for when the unexpected or ‘unplanned’ happens—and it will, more often than you think. I believe it’s important to be flexible and ‘pad’ some time in your schedule for the unexpected.”

We are all juggling a great deal. We tend to not leave time for interruptions. And many of these interruptions are necessary. Don’t juggle so much that you don’t take time for the unexpected and for people.

People can sense when they’re “bothering” us or when they don’t have our full attention. If a person interrupts one of the tasks you are doing, put aside that task and give them your undivided attention. The project will be there when they’re gone. It’s not going anywhere. Will you accomplish it faster because of the interruption? No, but you will communicate to that person that they are more important.

As you are putting your task list together, give yourself wiggle room for those interruptions. If your list is so long you will need every minute to accomplish it, then you may need to cut back on your list. You can’t make your task list so long that you don’t have time for people.

Think Huge!

Small Acts of Kindness Can Have a Big Impact

Have you woken up one morning and thought to yourself that your life is just a monotonous routine of work or school? Have you thought about stepping away from your everyday schedule to do something random to help someone out? Maybe even smile to make someone's day? Small actions like these can make life more positive and better to live for another person.

It’s the holiday season and this is the perfect time to renew your intentions and think about giving. But maybe this year, let this feeling of giving continue throughout the year. There are various ways you carry these small, simple actions out. Acts of Kindness is a great web site where you can get information about implementing ideas of random acts of kindness in classrooms, communities and foundations. It doesn’t have to be a huge dollar amount to be an act of kindness; you just have to have a good intention for it.

Think about it! Do you feel like 2009 has flown by? Time will just keep on passing by, so start your random acts of kindness now. Take a moment today to restructure your life in a way that is not centered on just your individual needs. Decide to get out there and do a random act of kindness. Maybe it will be helping someone cross a street, sending baked goods to a neighbor or even as simple as yielding for someone on the street. If you have random act of kindness suggestion, please share to encourage others to Think Huge and spread the word. That could even be your random act of kindness for today!

Down Time Leads to More Up Time

Have you ever been burned out? If you’re human, then the answer is “yes.” The question to ask is not “Have you been burned out?” but rather “How do you avoid getting there?” The answer to that question is you must build some “down” time into your life.

More specifically, you must build daily, weekly and monthly down time. Having more down time (moments when you are not working, rushing, doing house chores, taking care of the kids, etc.) will lead to more up time (moments when you give your best to your job, your family and others).

Down time should take three forms:

(1) Daily down time—Each day you need time to yourself. Whether you are a busy mom or executive you have to unwind sometime during the day. It can take many forms—reading, journaling, exercising, watching your favorite TV show or anything else that gives you pleasure. At the very least, you should build one hour per day for relaxing; if you don’t then eventually you will crash and burn (and to be honest, one hour is a minimum).

(2) Weekly recharge time—Down time is not only a daily activity; it is a weekly must as well. A weekly recharge means an extended period (more than one hour) to de-plug and do something fun. It could be watching a football game, hiking, working in the garden (if you enjoy playing in the dirt!), watching a movie or anything that means you will “stop down” for more than an hour. And notice we used the word “de-plug.” That means unplugging yourself from the laptop, e-mail, Twitter and other electronic gadgets. You can’t recharge if you’re plugged into your electronics.

(3) Monthly refocus session—Even if you are taking daily and weekly time for yourself you can still burn out. It’s important to also refocus on your core priorities every month. A monthly refocus is not necessarily doing a fun activity, but rather taking some time to reflect on your goals (both personal and professional) and what motivates you in life. Do you still love your job? If not, why? Are you connecting emotionally with your significant other? If not, remember why you fell in love with them. Are your kids driving you crazy? Reflect on the limited time you have with them. Refocusing yourself on your core beliefs, values and goals helps you stay fresh at home and work.

You’ve probably read about the importance of journaling, exercising and doing all those things to prevent burnout. Those all are good and well (and things you should be doing). But truly thinking huge means taking daily, weekly and monthly steps to recharge your batteries.

Think Huge!

Your Job: The Next Scary Movie?

Why do we look forward to watching horror movies? We know that we will be frightened and probably won’t sleep that night, but we continually subject ourselves to this experience.  These movies hook us for two main reasons; the rush of anticipation and fright as well as the thrill of the unknown/unexpected.

The rush from these movies is addictive because it is fun to not know what (or who) is around the corner. Classics such as "Nightmare on Elm Street" and "Friday the 13th" use this anticipation to involve the audience with what’s going on. When you feel the urge to shout, “Don’t open that door!” at the screen, then you have been hooked. You are involved in this movie because you know that just behind that door is something scary. The fear of the unexpected keeps you on the edge of your seat.

What if you applied this to your life? Does this rush of not knowing translate into a fear of the unexpected? In your professional life, it may seem silly to think that you should feel this rush often, but this may be the key to career happiness. Your passion should be at the center of your career, with each opportunity providing that rush for you. Allow yourself to Think Huge and experience this. Dedicate your time to finding your professional passion (whether it is at your current job or if you are looking to pursue a new career path). That rush of adrenaline serves as a great motivator for completing the each new task at hand.

Also, unexpected tasks and opportunities should present an exciting challenge, not a fear of the unknown. Looking forward to the next task is a good indicator that you have found your professional passion. Each opportunity provides a unique opportunity to get past the unknown and discover something new about yourself. Now, I am not saying that each day at your job should be like a horror movie (if it is, then you may need to have a chat with your boss), but each new task presents a unique opportunity to learn and grow. Approaching your career with this attitude allows you to Think Huge.

And for those scary movie fans in need of an extra rush of adrenaline, here is a great list of the Top 50 Horror Movies. Remember to Think Huge and feel free to shout back with any feedback.

Think Huge With Kerrie Hilton

I first came across Kerrie Hilton on Twitter.  As I do each week, I look for inspirational stories of how others Think Huge and then share them with those who follow me on Twitter.  However, how I found Kerrie’s story was different.  I first saw @12monkeys had congratulated @runkerrierun for her inspirational story.  As I Think People (one of the six Think Huge principals), I joined the conversation and asked @12monkeys to share her story.  Kerrie then sent me a link to her blog post where I was intrigued and excited to see Kerrie living out the six Think Huge principals in her own life.

To begin, Kerrie started out with Think Vision.  One can’t Think Huge unless they know exactly where they want to go. For Kerrie, she had a vision, “I decided to do something, I did it, and as a result I lost 55 lbs. and ran a marathon in 7 months. ”  However, it was not always easy and there were many personal obstacles Kerrie had to overcome.  Kerrie notes, “In Feb. 2009 I was an overweight stay-at-home mom that was happy, but didn’t like the direction ‘my’ life was going in. With 3 kids it’s easy to lose sight of your own needs. ”

Next, Kerrie begin to Think People.  Thinking huge will get one absolutely nowhere unless they involve people in their life.  For Kerrie she had support. “I started a weight loss plan with my friend Jackie’s help and started running, which isn’t something I was ever particularly good at,” Kerrie stated.  In addition, Kerrie also mentioned, “I decided to run a marathon after consulting my husband, who said, “Go for it.” Without the support of my husband and oldest daughter it would not have been possible.”  By having the support of those around her, Kerrie was able to put her vision into action.

As she begin to run the marathon, it became clear to Kerrie that she needed to Think Perseverance.  Thinking huge is not a “name it and claim it” gospel. One will encounter trials in life and thinking huge means overcoming those obstacles.  Kerrie had to do just that and recalls, “Soon, I started to feel sick and by mile 15 I was slowed almost to a walk. It felt like I was running though knee-high mud though I was pushing as hard as I could. This had never happened in training and actually 15 miles became ‘no big deal’ for me. I decided not to panic; no way would I have ‘DNF’ beside my name (the dreaded “did not finish”).”

In reflection of the race, Kerrie realized she had accomplished something incredible was able to Think Learning. One will only grow as much you are learning.  For Kerrie, she mentioned, “This was more incredible than any race I’ve ever run because the training was such a sacrifice and juggling schedules with 3 kids was such a struggle. I learned that no matter how prepared you are, you have to run YOUR OWN race, or the outcome will not be what you expect.”

Throughout her entire marathon journey Kerrie, it was important for Kerrie to Think Time.  Truly thinking huge means we are investing our time in the right way.  Kerrie recalls, “The best part for me was looking at my picture at the end of it all. I went from a size 16 to a 6 and ran a marathon in 7 months.”

Finally, a key reason Kerrie was able to achieve her goal was because she was able to Think Passion.  One needs to love whatever they are doing in life.  Kerrie remembers, “It really was as easy as deciding to do something and then taking the steps to make the changes to get it done. I truly think that anyone can do whatever it is they want as long as they have a goal, motivation, and most of all, support. Ordinary people can do extraordinary things”.

What’s your Think Huge story?  How have you been able to use the six Think Huge principals in your life.  Shout back and leave a comment with your thoughts.  I would love to hear from you.

Help With Reaching Goals

What goals, dreams and ambitions do you have? What have you always wanted to be (when you grow up!)? As long as I can remember, I’ve always wanted to be a writer. I’m thinking about that now because today marks the advance release of my latest book, Think Huge: How to Elevate Your Life and Your Business. Advanced copies are available on my website today; the Amazon release date is September 8^th.

But I don’t want this blog post to be about me or my goals. Instead, I want to share what I’ve learned along the journey of writing Think Huge in hopes that maybe a few of the lessons will help you achieve your goals.

So here are some tips I’ve learned in the last nine months on my book writing journey. These aren’t rocket science lessons but hopefully you can pick up one or two good tips to help you achieve one of your lifelong dreams.

Have a Cheerleader

We all need encouragement. Every one of us. You want to surround yourself with people who will cheer for you. My wife refers to herself as the “President of My Fan Club.” Of course, I don’t really have a fan club but it’s an endearing way for her to show incredible support for my endeavors.

Some people will expect you to fail while others will be naturally cynical towards you achieving your goals. Move away from those type of folks. They are toxic and negative. Instead surround yourself with people who will encourage you, empower you and enlighten you.

Many times through writing Think Huge my wife would say encouraging words. Sometimes it was just enough to get through the monotonous days of trying to put pen on paper. No matter what your goals are, make sure you have someone in your corner who is cheering for you.

Bring Others Along

Most goals are not solo goals. Much of what any of us accomplish today requires the help of others. In fact, life is meant to be shared, not lived in a vacuum.

I was fortunate to have Rory Rowland work on Think Huge as a co-author. He brought great ideas and insights all along the way. We were also able to hold each other accountable with deadlines. Could I have written the book by myself? Sure, but it was more fun to do it with Rory and the end result is better because of his input.

Many athletes (even in solo sports) train with others. It brings out the best in us. Collaboration is a fancy word but it really just means “working together.” No matter what your goal is (lose weight, finish school, write a book, start a new career, train for a race,) involve others in the process.

Take Daily Steps

Many goals don’t just involve others, they also involve time. And a little time can turn into a lot of time. You don’t just snap your fingers and achieve your goals right away. You will have to take daily steps.

Just like the old proverb that answers the question, “How do you eat an elephant?” with the answer, “One piece at a time,” you have to take goal achievement one step (or piece) at a time.

I have several colleagues at work who are in the process of getting additional education. They are taking courses while they are working full-time. That’s hard. With their responsibilities they can’t just quite work and devote themselves full-time to school. Instead, they have to take a few (sometimes just one) course every semester. They are taking daily steps toward their education.

So don’t try and achieve your goal all at once. Instead, like the 1970s sitcom title says, take it “One Day at a Time.”

Celebrate Success

Hopefully along the way you will have minor victories before you reach your final goal. It’s important to celebrate those as well. If you want to lose 20 pounds, then every time you lose 5 celebrate (just not with a big steak dinner!). Reward yourself—you earned it. Having those little celebrations along the way will also help you push on to the finish line of your ultimate goal.

One motivational tactic some marathon runners use is to eat a jelly bean at every mile. As the miles increase toward their ultimate finish of 26.2 miles they have fewer and fewer jelly beans. They reward themselves every mile. It can provide that little bit of extra motivation to the end.

So no matter what your goal is, be sure you have a cheerleader, bring others along, take daily steps, and celebrate success. What other ideas do you have to help others reach their goals?

Think Huge!

Marking Time: The Start of Another School Year

     

 

People mark time in multiple ways: dates on a calendar, seasonal activities, the start of football or baseball season, anniversaries, birthdays and other key events. At the Arnold household, we tend to mark time by the start of a new school year. And Monday was such a “date-marker.”

Some of those school years and school dates are more significant than others. For example, my wife is a first grade teacher and yesterday marked the first time in our family’s recent history that she will not have one of our daughters at the elementary school she teaches. You see, they are each growing up and our youngest is now in middle school.

Talk about a mixed bag of emotions! Sad? Of course. But also a proud moment. We remember the days when we walked into each of our daughter’s kindergarten class and took their picture with their teacher. Now those photos are of our kids opening their own locker and rushing off to class with a quick wave good-bye.

Of course, some parents do the “happy dance” when school starts. And that’s okay too! Just be sure you are cherishing each and every moment. Don’t let those special days go by without taking special pictures or videos. Trust me, you’ll want those later.

My colleague Colleen Cormier (who helps me with the e-zine On The Mark) took her son to kindergarten Monday. Here is what she said about the event:

“I was fine until I left his classroom. The teacher allowed the parents to go in and take a few pictures, etc. He put his lunch in his cubby that he claimed on meet the teacher night, hung his backpack on his hook, and sat down by his name tag, and then we left. I turned around to look at him one last time in the classroom and the tears started flowing. He looked so big and happy and independent—all the things I raised him to be, but all the things that show he doesn’t need me quite as much as he used to. It was hard, but I would much rather be the one in tears than him, and he never saw my tears. So, life is good.”

So another year passes. Another point in time where our girls are closer to becoming young women. My wife lovingly reminds me to always cherish the time we have with our girls. Of course, I’m a male so I don’t always get that point! But she’s right: always cherish time with your kids.

Some people say about your kids growing up, “blink and it’s over.” As I took a picture of my wife with our girls moments before they left for the first day of school this year I remembered those other pictures: the ones where the kids are short and cute. Now they are tall and beautiful (much like my wife). I want to keep my eyes open and never close them: because if I blink I might miss something.

You only have so many time markers with your kids. Be sure to make them count.

Think Huge!